Maybe it’s hormonal, although I hate throwing that excuse out there.
Maybe the weather. Rainy, cold, no snow to play in, muddy yards that aren’t conducive to sending the kids outside. To be honest, I’d rather have snow.
Maybe I’m just tired, so tired that I keep falling asleep on the couch downstairs instead of in my comfy warm bed, waking every morning with aches and pains from sleeping in a ball in one position all night. But if I try to shut off and go upstairs before Hubby gets home, I feel guilty that I haven’t folded the basket of laundry or finished writing out the bills or done the sinkful of dishes, because it’s all on my shoulders, and if I don’t do it, it doesn’t get done.
I’m flying-off-the-handle angry at recent stories about school bullies and seriously want to see these little terrorists doing perp walks out of courtrooms. I’m frustrated with a high school curriculum that uses block scheduling, where my kid most likely will have English class in the first semester freshman year and not again until second semester sophomore year (but he can take over 20 art and music electives... and they wonder why the US is underperforming other countries!). I’m working on a fundraiser with friends... and an idiot who was involved in the Mean Mom debacle last year, who has many opinions about what we’re not doing right but does none of the work herself. I can’t even indulge in my comfy cup of cocoa at night – four extra pounds on the scale, and there’s not even any Bailey’s in it or whipped cream on it!
I’m a planner, a list-maker, and it’s as if the rest of my world would prefer to live by the seat of their pants. I don’t want to be this angry person I’m becoming, but I’m ticked off at everything lately and don’t know how not to be. I need to find my disconnect switch. On that note, something new - I’m shutting down every weeknight at 9:00. No watching the news, no doing chores. Getting in my PJs and going to my room, where the laptop is being put to use as a DVD player. I started last night (thank you, Netflix!) with “P.S. I Love You”.
Guess what? It helped. Yeah, I used a handful of Kleenex, laughing some places through my tears, but overall, a pretty good movie.
P.S. - Watching the charming Misters Butler, Connick Jr., and Morgan didn't make me angry!
P.P.S. - I'd like to go to Ireland. NOW, please!
So, is there ever a time you have to take a step back and try to understand why your mood is so negative? When you get angry over the little things? How do you deal with it?